Lonesome Tonight?

So, according to the latest research (reported in The Guardian the other day), women tend to choose less successful, less handsome men, as they subconsciously believe that there's less chance of losing them to a career or other women. Speaking from personal experience, I can tell you that this is complete bollocks. Trust me - I'm a perennial under-achiever and I'm no oil painting. Oh yes, I'm also a man. A still single man, at an age when my mother would have hoped that I'd been divorced at least twice. I'm not quite sure which women were consulted in this study (or, indeed, if any women were consulted - its authors were probably merely moderately successful, only averagely handsome, male researchers who have never actually met a woman, let alone spoken to one), but I've found the reality of the situation quite different.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not a misogynist - I love women. I find their company infinitely preferable to that of other men (most of the time). However, the fact is that they tend to see me - a man who apparently fits the profile identified by this research as their ideal mate - as a best friend, or surrogate older brother. Which is fine. Most of the time. It can get very frustrating when said woman fits my profile of ideal mate, though. When it comes to closer relationships, I inevitably find myself edged out by either unfeasibly handsome, successful but smooth types, or fuck ugly, brainless, sport-loving thugs. Which, I suppose, shows that the research might be half-right, as the second type of guy could be described as less successful and not good looking. Not, of course, that I'm letting this situation drive me to despair. Although I did find myself sneaking a look at the Guardian's personal ads the other day. However, the thought of meeting other desperate Guardian readers was enough to remind me of the advantages of being single...