Teenage Kicks

I see the media is bleating on about the amount of time kids are spending in front of the TV or at their computers, yet again! I like the way that at one time it was just television which was seen as an evil corrupting influence on our children, now home computers - once heralded by the self same press as an indispensable educational tool which would broaden children's minds - is now lumped in with it. The gist of these stories is that thanks to the amount of time they're spending in front of video screens, children aren't getting outside enough. This, in turn, means that they don't get enough exercise (so childhood obesity is just down to much TV watching apparently, fast food has nothing to do with it) and they don't develop social skills. Of course, this is the same great outdoors which the media assures us is populated by paedophiles, knife-wielding gangs of thugs and crack dealers. Indeed, whenever a child is attacked or killed whilst playing outside, we get screaming headlines as to how any responsible parent could allow their child out unaccompanied in a such an obviously dangerous environment.

What I really like about this thesis that kids aren't getting outside enough, is the inherent assumption that getting out of the house - away from any form of adult supervision - is somehow good for them. I hate to dispel the myth but when I was a kid, back in the seventies, I spent most of my free time outside involved in various acts of minor vandalism. To be precise, I was something of a teenage arsonist. Oh, nothing big, I assure you - and no lives (other than those of me and my friends ) were ever put at risk - but piles of old tyres on dumps, waste bins and the like, were all just aching to be burned as far as I was concerned! I later graduated to fireworks and dangerous homemade explosives, but that's another story. But heck, at least we were out in the fresh air - that had to be healthier than being cooped up in the house watching TV, surely? Well, it probably was, except for the toxic fumes from the burning rubber. I suppose we did get more exercise - mainly when running away from security guards and policemen. Still, the optimists will say, it was all just harmless childhood pranks, and still better than having our morals corrupted by looking at porn on the internet. Well actually, when we weren't setting fire to things, we were often searching for popn magazines abandoned in hedgerows and the like. When we weren't being corrupted that way, we were often to be found round the back of someone's dad's shed experimenting with alcohol and/or smoking. At least we didn't have the perverts and knife gangs stalking the streets in those days...

So there you have it - what would you rather your children were doing? Surfing the net and/or watching TV (from which they might actually learn something useful, and will probably develop better social skills from instant messaging than they would in the local crack house) in the safety of your own home, or out on those mean, mean streets with all their other drunken teenage friends (who have been told to 'go out and play' by their parents), puking, brawling and making 'Happy Slapping' videos?