Licence to Surf

I've come to the conclusion that some people just shouldn't be allowed internet access. They clearly can't handle the surfeit of information they find there, and/or are totally lacking the mental capabilities to understand differing viewpoints, or engage in meaningful and rational discourse. I'm proposing that before you can sign up for an internet connection, you should have to take some kind of test to establish your intelligence level. Based on the results of this, you'd be issued with a licence to surf. Obviously, only the most intelligent would be awarded full licences which would allow them full and unfettered access to the whole web. Others would be given licences which would restrict them only to those parts of the web they are capable of understanding. Gullible idiots and conspiracy theorists, for instance, wouldn't be allowed near satire and humour sites, as they are clearly incapable of discerning fact from fiction, and such sites might confuse them. Similarly, brain dead morons with IQs less than their shoe size and 'opinions' provided by the media would not, under any circumstances, be allowed near forums.

So, I hear you asking, what has brought about this train of thought? Well, I recently had the misfortune to visit the forums on The Sun's web site. Jesus! Talk about the droolings of morons! Every knee jerk reaction and idiocy known to man can be encountered there, posted by people who should never be allowed near a keyboard. It is truly terrifying that such ignorance and bigotry can still be found in the 21st century. It wouldn't be so bad if this sort of thing could be confined to ghettos like The Sun's forums, but sadly you find the same sort of moronic commentary repeated all over the web. If it isn't the bigots, it is the conspiracy theorists with their disregard for reason and facts, then there are the 'fans'. God save me from the 'fans'! Worst of all are the so called 'fans' of cult TV series and films, the pillocks who see themselves as guardians of some fundamental 'truth' about the object of their obsessions. Any deviance from the 'accepted' orthodoxy of the series or film's formula is heresy. Woe betide any one who dares to vary these formulae, as Russell T Davies has found with Dr Who. It doesn't matter that the new version is hugely popular, critically acclaimed and far more sophisticated and accessible than the original - it isn't true to the fans' vision! He's tinkered with it without consulting them! How dare he! You wouldn't believe the amount of hate out there for Davies, and all he's done is breathed new life into a much loved old favourite.

In fact, there's a lot of hate out there on the web generally. It's just full of horrible bastards spewing out bile. It really is sad, the web presents a tremendous opportunity for individuals to express themselves creatively. Instead, people seem to spend most of their time attacking others in the most vicious ways. I wouldn't mind, but they aren't even witty or clever about it. They just call anybody who disagrees with them 'cunts' and tell them to 'fuck off'. I really do find it wearying. Indeed, I'm seriously considering withdrawing from all activities on the web other than updating The Sleaze and this blog. Maybe I'm just getting old and cranky, but I'm afraid I really don't 'get' this new fangled 'Web 2.0' with its social networking sites and where yobs uploading videos of their anti-social behaviour passes for content creation. In the meantime, I'm taking an Easter break, so I'll only be posting here infrequently over the next week and a bit. Maybe a break will help refresh my jaded perspective on all things web-related.