Friday, February 23, 2007

Photographic Evidence

Have you seen the picture of the guy they've arrested for sending those letter bombs? I mean, if ever a picture shrieked 'Weirdo!', this is it! It presents such a stereotypical image of the lone weirdo who builds bombs in his bedroom, in between watching videos of the X Files and masturbating over pictures of Sarah Michelle Gellar, that I'm left wondering if the press have, in any way, manipulated it. I can't believe that the poor bastard's family authorised its release (unless, of course, they hate him). From the police's point of view, it is perfect. They don't have to bother building a case now - just show that photo to the jury and you'll get a unanimous guilty verdict.

This particular suspect already gives the press everything it needs for its headlines: 'loner', 'goth', 'awkward teenager', 'lives with his mother'. All of these, and more, have already been bandied about, as if any combination of these traits automatically implies guilt. No doubt if it comes to light that as a teenager he built Airfix plastic kits of tanks and planes, this will be taken of evidence of a dangerous 'fixation on military weapons' . God help the poor schmuck if he ever constructed a model of a Tiger tank - they'll be screaming 'Nazi!' from every headline!

There must be a secret police unit somewhere dedicated to finding the most incriminating looking photo of any suspect they arrest. All those embarrassing school photos you thought you'd destroyed? They'll find a copy! I have no doubt that if I'm ever arrested they'll either come up with one of those photos of me doing drunken impressions of the Pope while on holiday in Ireland, or one of me with unkempt shoulder length hair from my student days. Either way, it would ensure a conviction!



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