A Knock on the Door in the Night

When is this god awful weather going to end and who was knocking on my front door after midnight?  To address the first question - we're now pretty much two thirds of the way through March and it still feels like winter and I'm still being threatened with snow.  This is meant to be the start of Spring for God's sake!  I'm not expecting a heatwave, but some milder temperatures and a sight of the sun would be in order.  And do the weather forecasters help?  No, they do not.  They just predict yet more of the same for the foreseeable future!  It's Easter at the end of next week and, laughably, the start of British Summer Time!  Once again, I'm moved to ask: what's David Cameron going to do about this weather?  He's always keen to cut spending on essential services, but apparently not willing to cut bad weather.  We want fewer cold, rainy or snowy days - do something about it Cameron!  I don't care if it is all part of an EU directive aimed at evening out the weather in Europe and ensuring that everyone has to endure the same amount of climactic misery - sort it!  I don't the Spanish or Italians suffering constant blizzards and freezing cold, isn't about time they were forced to share their sunny weather with us and take their share of the misery?  Come on Cameron. you are always telling us how you are going to sort those European bastards out - well, how about making a start by grabbing us some of the Mediterranean bastards' sunshine, eh?

Now, having sorted that out, let's get to the other pressing question: was it you knocking on my front door in the early hours?  Now, I don't like people knocking on my door at any time, but after midnight it really is beyond the pale.  I know what you are thinking - why didn't he answer it, then he'd know who it was.  But let me ask you, would you answer a knock on your front door, after midnight, when you aren't expecting anyone?  To put it all in perspective, I was minding my own business, sat on my sofa watching an episode of American Dad I couldn't remember having seen before, thinking about going to bed, when there's this knock.  Naturally, I jumped, then, on auto-pilot, went to pick up my keys and open the door to the hall way.  Then I stopped as I recalled what time it was, that I wasn't expecting anyone and that I don't have a security chain on the door.  Was I going to open it to God knows who in the middle of the night?  Moreover, it occurred to me that, whoever it was, hadn't used the, pretty prominent, door knocker, as any regular caller would, but had instead knocked on the wooden surface of the door with their hand, (they are two distinctly different sounds).  So I decided to sit back down and see what happened.  If it was some kind of emergency they would knock again, I reasoned.  Likewise, if it was, for some reason, the police, they would knock again and probably identify themselves by shouting through the letter box.  There was no further knock, so I have to assume that whoever it was went away.  Assuming it was no one I knew, (If it was, surely they would have phoned), it raises the question of exactly what kind of idiot goes around knocking on complete stranger's doors after midnight?