Rock and Roll Pope?

So, what do you think of that new Pope, eh?  A bloody Argentinian!  Well, he'd better not try any of that 'hand of God' bollocks, or he can go screw!  Still, at least he isn't a Nazi, like the last one.  But hey, don't worry because there are now allegations of his collusion with Argentina's late, unlamented, military dictatorship - so we still have a moral stick to beat the Papacy with!  As he's a Jesuit, can we expect to see him start dispensing with some of the Catholic church's more ostentatious aspects - perhaps redistributing some of its wealth to the poor?  I'm not holding my breath.  If nothing else, at least he's chosen a new name - Francis - rather than rehashing any of the old standards like John, Paul, John Paul or Benedict.  I don't know about you, but the lack of originality in Pope names was really beginning to bug me.  I swear, if there had been another Pius, I would have screamed.  You'd think that they'd at least try revisiting some of the ones we haven't had for at least a century - aren't we overdue another Pope Adrian, Sixtus, Callixtus or Urban?  Or how about another Boniface, Clement or Innocent?

But Pope Francis it is - named, no doubt, for Francis Rossi of Status Quo in a desperate attempt to modernise the church by showing those crazy kids that even the Vatican has heard about that new-fangled rock'n'roll.  Maybe that's going to be this Pope's gimmick - standing on the balcony overlooking St Peter's Square thrashing his guitar as he belts out a few Quo covers.  The selection of another Septuagenarian for the Papacy, whilst clearly a brave blow against ageism, is worryingly reminiscent of the last days of the Soviet Union, when they kept selecting old men as leaders.  Old men in poor health, to be accurate, who kept going down with what the Soviet media described as 'a heavy cold', which resulted in them vanishing from public view for several months, until it was announced that the cold had escalated to death.  Perhaps that's why Pope Benedict resigned so abruptly - he felt a 'heavy cold' coming on.