Still More Overheard Conversations

Another fragment of conversation recently overheard - this time on the top deck of a number fifty-seven bus:

Bald bloke: "That Buzz Aldrin guy became a total fruit-loop after he came back from the moon - he once arrived at a NASA party dressed in a kitchen roll and wearing a plastic plant pot on his head. He reckoned it gave him protection from the moons rays."

Youth with earphones: "Yeah, I heard about that - didn't he stir the punch bowl with his penis?"

Girl with pierced lip: "I once met this guy who said he'd been in space. I asked how farts behaved in zero gravity. He didn't answer me but he did attempt to touch me up."

Woman with shopping bag: "It's all bollocks - they never went to the moon at all. My Gran reckons she saw them filming it on the beach at Weston Super Mare back in 1969. She says if you look closely at the TV footage of the first landing, you can see the kiddies being given donkey rides reflected in Neil Armstrong's visor."

Youth with earphones: "Nah, they deffo went to the moon, at least the first one was real, anyway. When they got there they found the Nazis had already set up a colony there. The CIA had to brainwash them when they got back - that's why Aldrin went bonkers."

At which point a tramp evacuated his bowels on the lower deck, forcing the abandonment of the bus.