The Art of Self Deception

The appointment of Fabio Capello as England football manager drew the usual chorus of laments from various footballing quarters to the effect that the job should have gone to an Englishman. "It's like having an Italian come and take your job," Reading's Steve Coppell reportedly claimed. Well, Steve, it wasn't actually your job he got, was it? You were never a contender and, with Reading sliding down the table, the call isn't likely to come any time soon. Meanwhile Paul Ince of MK Dons was voicing the opinion that it was completely unnecessary to appoint a foreigner as there were plenty of English coaches who could do the job. Like who, Paul? Sam Allardyce? Give me a break! Alan Curbishley, specialist in mid-table mediocrity? I don't think so. The truth is, all these laments are nothing more than self-deception, something we're very good at in the UK. The fact is that we had to appoint an Italian as England head coach because there aren't any English coaches up to the job. The man he's replacing, Steve McClaren proved that. The only possible exception was 'Arry Redknapp, but he was out of the running as soon as he had his collar felt by the Old Bill.

But we just don't seem to care about little things like facts in this country. Fuelled by the bombastic claims of the tabloid press, we still imagine that we're a footballing superpower. Even worse, we seem to think that we're still some kind of political and military power in the real world. Such delusions are the only explanation for the preposterous parades now being staged for soldiers returning from Iraq and Afghanistan, not to mention the degree to which we fetishize the military, making them out to be virtuous warriors for truth who can do no wrong. What utter bollocks. We're not a world power, at best we're a supporting player in someone else's politically motivated conflicts. Just accept it. We're crap. It's all part of the 'Unbearable Crapness of Being'. But should we be surprised by this national self deception? After all, we do it all the time on a micro level, deceiving ourselves into being thinner than we really are, more interesting than we actually are and more attractive to women than is the case. Perhaps if we could all accept our own personal crapness, we could start to shake off this national self deception.