Whatever Happened to...Lord Lucan?

So Lord Lucan fled to Africa, with the aid of his wealthy friends, after murdering his children's nanny. At least, that's the claim being made by a former employee of the late John Aspinall, one of those wealthy friends. Apparently she was involved in arranging for Lucan's children to travel to Africa 'on holiday', where they could be seen by their father. Sadly, she didn't say whether he blacked up or not as part of his disguise. After all, by the 1970s a posh white Englishman might have seemed a bit conspicuous in some parts of Africa. Indeed, such a person could even have become a target for African nationalists and the like. Bearing in mind that Aspinall's former aide also claimed that the children never actually met their father during these visits, but that he simply observed them from a distance, I should imagine that he did apply the boot polish to, at the very least, his face.

Personally, I'd like to think that his disguise was far more extensive - head to foot boot polish, an afro wig, grass skirt, spear and perhaps even a bone through his nose. Little did those young children realise, but that proud Masai warrior they saw dancing wildly around a fire, vigourously waving his spear and shouting 'Umbongo, Umbongo, they drink it in the Congo', was actually their father. With a disguise that effective, is it any wonder that the British police could never find Lucan? Mind you, having seen an interview with the retired police detective who headed the hunt for Lord Lucan, I wasn't surprised that Lucan evaded capture. To be frank, he looked like they'd found him sleeping on a park bench and had probably paid him for the interview with a bottle of meths. But what of Lucan's eventual fate? Is he still alive? Did Nelson Mandela actually die in hospital last week, to be replaced by the still blacked up Lucan? Who knows. Certainly not the UK police.