To Hell With Love!

We're rapidly approaching that day again, the one that all us singles dread, the 14th of February. St Valentine's bloody day. As I've mentioned here before, the whole day is an ordeal if you aren't a couple. It's twenty four hours of being bombarded with bollocks about how wonderful it is to be in love, etc. Yeah, rub it in, why don't you? Quite frankly, I don't know why hordes of happy couples don't just gather outside my house, waving placards saying 'Single Weirdo', chanting 'You sad bastard, you', and throwing those heart-shaped chocolates at my windows. At least I'd be safe inside, any poor single bastard caught out in the open would undoubtedly be hunted down by packs of 'loving couples', and beaten to death with those heart-shaped balloons. The more I think about it, the more I suspect that the St Valentine's Day Massacre in 1929 was actually a hit on a bunch of unfortunate singles by some 'loved up' couples, rather than being the result of a gang war between Al Capone and 'Bugs' Moran.

I really do think this annual bombardment of sickly 'romantic' schlock constitutes bullying. If any other demographic was subjected to such an assault upon their lifestyles it would be deemed 'racist' or 'sexist'. But apparently it's OK to harass single people and drive them to the brink of suicidal depression. What we really need is a day devoted to the joys of singlehood to counter balance the horror of Valentine's Day. There could be non-sentimental cards which we singles send ourselves to celebrate our singleness. And balloons. We could all carry them to show that we're single and proud. But seriously, having made a resolution to give up on fantasies of romance this year, I'm not going to allow myself to be bullied this Valentine's day. I can now honestly say that for me, being single is a lifestyle choice, and I'm damned if I'm going to be made to feel ashamed of it! To Hell with love!