Keep Taking The Pills

Apparently my brother's Christmas was ruined by the presence of Jedward on every TV chat show and panel show. He's one of the millions of people driven to the brink of insanity by the gibberings of the Irish twins. Personally, I have nothing against them. I'm not sure what they're for, or why they're considered celebrities, but they seem nice enough, albeit excitable, lads. The main reaction they invoke from me is to shout at the television or radio, "For God's sake, take your bloody medication!" Because that's my theory about Jedward - that they're suffering from some sort of behavioural problem, hyperactivity or attention deficit syndrome maybe, and they've stopped taking their pills. If they were to go back on their medication they'd probably have greasy flat hair, wear drab sports jackets with leather patches on the elbows and sport thick-lensed glasses with black plastic frames. But they wouldn't be famous, because to be a celebrity these days, it seems, you have to indulge in the kind of 'outrageous' behaviour ordinarily associated with psychological disorders.

Whilst Jedward don't tend to irritate me that much, someone who did last week was Zooey Deschenal in the first episode of her sitcom New Girl on Channel Four. I only tried watching it because of the number of poor reports about it I'd read online. It surely couldn't be that bad, could it? Within the first ten minutes I was shouting at my TV, begging for someone to give her a slap, her character was so irritating. Once again, I was screaming for her to take her medication and spare us all the 'kookiness', or, as I like to call it, psychotic behaviour. The fundamental problem with the series' scenario is that, having cast Deschenal in the lead, the makers have to explain why she has such problems attracting men, after all, she's an obviously attractive woman. So, they make her weird. Clearly, somebody must have pointed out that actually, many men aren't put off by slightly odd women. The makers' answer was simply to ramp up the character's weirdness to the point that she comes over as either having extreme learning difficulties and behavioural problems, or being crazy serial killer type woman who probably stalks her victims, before kidnapping and castrating them. Which probably isn't the effect they're going for - I'm sure they think she comes over as 'cute and kooky', rather than 'crazy and homicidal'. Anyway, the end result is that I have no intention of watching another episode, otherwise I'll be the one forced to pop pills, to keep my blood pressure down, if nothing else.