Gold Fingered
The world of daytime TV is a weird and wonderful place, and I'm not just talking about the Jeremy Kyle-style freak shows, the endless cheap game shows, property programmes and Australian soaps. The commercials are wonderfully shite and low-rent too. Particularly the ones on Five. Everybody, I'm sure, is familiar with all those sad ads they run for personal loans from dubious-looking finance companies, not to mention the commercials for personal injury claim lawyers, but lately my personal favourite has been the one urging you to send in your 'unwanted gold'. It's not just the fact that their office appears to be located in someone's loft conversion that I like about this ad, it's the picture of people having bars of gold lying about their houses it conjures up that I like. You can just imagine people watching it and saying 'Quick, check down the back of the sofa - there could be some gold bullion down there which has fallen out of my pockets'.
But best of all about this commercial is the presenter. Whilst you might imagine the ideal person to front such a service would be Auric Goldfinger, the makers have, sadly, not resurrected the late Gert Froebe, instead opting for wild-eyed individual who looks like a creepy middle-aged version of Robert Webb from Mitchell and Webb. His invitation to ring up for their 'gold kit' (which turns out to be a plastic bag in which to put your 'unwanted jewelery') has a suitably manic edge to it. At any moment you expect him to start rubbing his hands and cackling at the thought of all that gold heading his way. It really is quite surreal. Perhaps it is all part of a plot by some James Bond villain to corner the world's gold reserves through buying up Channel Five viewers' Ratner's jewelery. Maybe 007's foiling of all his previous schemes for global domination have left him so strapped for cash that this is the only way he can afford to put his latest nefarious scheme into motion - through the medium of low-budget daytime TV commercials. Who knows, perhaps his top secret lair really is someone's rented loft space? Stranger things have happened in the world of day time TV.
But best of all about this commercial is the presenter. Whilst you might imagine the ideal person to front such a service would be Auric Goldfinger, the makers have, sadly, not resurrected the late Gert Froebe, instead opting for wild-eyed individual who looks like a creepy middle-aged version of Robert Webb from Mitchell and Webb. His invitation to ring up for their 'gold kit' (which turns out to be a plastic bag in which to put your 'unwanted jewelery') has a suitably manic edge to it. At any moment you expect him to start rubbing his hands and cackling at the thought of all that gold heading his way. It really is quite surreal. Perhaps it is all part of a plot by some James Bond villain to corner the world's gold reserves through buying up Channel Five viewers' Ratner's jewelery. Maybe 007's foiling of all his previous schemes for global domination have left him so strapped for cash that this is the only way he can afford to put his latest nefarious scheme into motion - through the medium of low-budget daytime TV commercials. Who knows, perhaps his top secret lair really is someone's rented loft space? Stranger things have happened in the world of day time TV.
posted by Doc Sleaze at
11:49 pm
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home