Thursday, September 14, 2023

'The Golden Spy Nymphs and Their Incredible Bed of Fire'


Another episode of 'The True History of World War Two According to Men's Pulp Magazines'.  This time around it is how 'The Golden Spy Nymphs and Their Incredible Bed of Fire', as related in the July 1969 issue of World of Men, won the war.  Yes indeed, the cover illustrates another tale of how scantily clad, gun-toting women operating behind enemy lines somehow did something vital to the war effort.  Something that none of your history books - which are just too obsessed with 'facts' - will tell you about.  Apparently, setting fire to a dockside prevented the Nazis from doing, well, something.  This something involved V-1 flying bombs being either loaded onto, or off of a ship, (which you can tell is German by that swastika neatly painted on the bow).  But not any V-1s - the one pictured appears to have a cockpit, which would surely turn it into some kind of suicide plane,  (Actually, some prototype V-1s did have cockpits, in order that pilots could test their flight attributes).  Obviously, the valiant efforts of these women prevented the Germans from sending hundreds of V-1s against the UK, causing destruction and significant civilian  casualties....

There's more (presumably Nazi) beastliness in 'The Blood Monster Who Claimed 1,000 Greek Maidens', (it is, of course, possible that this story might be set during the bloody Greek Civil War of the late forties, but this conflict wouldn't have been as well known to US readers as the German occupation of Greece in WW2).  Elsewhere in this issue it is sex, sex, sex.  First off there are the 'Teen Sin Orgies Where Anything Goes', another chapter in the men's magazines' obsession with the sex habits f young people.  Next, we have '10 Unnatural Sex Attitudes That Can Destroy You' - I'd like to think that was about which positions might be the most physically hazardous when having sex.  (I'd imagine anything where the man is upside down, causing a rush of blood to the head might have unfortunate consequences and if they were on a trapeze at the time, they might risk a fatal fall as well).  Finally, we have 'Expose: The Gay Ones - Where and How They Operate' - I'm not sure whether this is intended as a warning for red-blooded American heterosexuals in order that they can avoid such venues and possible induction into 'gayness', or a guide for the curious who fancy a 'bit of the other'.  So, there you have it - business as usual in the World of Men during the swinging sixties' final Summer.

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