Out West Again

More from the West of England's crime capital, Yeovil, via the Western Gazette website:  

'Scream-mask knife suspect warned by police to stop terrorising Yeovil residents'.  That's right, the town that has already suffered arson attacks and street brawls is now being menaced by a potential crazy serial killer!  But don't worry, as ever, Avon and Somerset Constabulary are on the case.  

'In a statement, Yeovil PCSO Jessica Forsey said: "We are aware that there have been incidents recently involving somebody wearing a mask from the Scream film trying to scare people.
We advise that the person responsible for this stops immediately and want to make them aware that if they are caught may face arrest."'  May face arrest?   I would have thought that waving a knife around in public places almost certainly warrants arrest.  But this is Yeovil, don't forget, which is so overrun with crime that the police don't have the resources either to assign a real police officer to the case or actually investigate it, relying instead on simply asking the perpetrator to stop via the local newspaper.

Just in case the first warning wasn't clear, the PCSO reiterates it later in her statement:

"We believe that this is just somebody playing pranks on people. However, the person responsible should be aware that they could be committing criminal offences and should stop immediately."  Well, that's doubtless a relief for the people of Yeovil - they aren't being stalked by a psychopath, it's all just a prank.  Probably.  And they are bound to stop after a stern warning like that, especially as they are now aware that they might be committing a criminal offence.  The trouble is that this is exactly the sort of thing the local Sheriff always says in slasher movies: "There's no need to worry folks, it's just some high school kids playing pranks."  Immediately after which, someone murders them in a bizarre fashion before subjecting the local community to a reign of terror.  So, people of Yeovil, on the basis of this Western Gazette story you should be afraid.  Very afraid.