Dream Doctor...

Dreams. I keep hearing how significant your dreams are meant to be. You know the sort of thing; for mystics they predict the future, for Freudians they're all about sex, whilst for Jungians they're all about interpreting the ancient archetypal images thrown up by the collective subconscious. So, basically, if you dream about riding a horse, to a mystic that means you're going to back the winner of the Grand National, for the Freudian it is all about your sex drive and how you feel inadequate because you aren't hung like a horse, whilst for the Jungian, the horse is the archetypal father image, it means you want to have sex with your old man. In addition to these schools of thought, there's a whole industry of whacko books out there claiming to help you interpret your dreams.

Anyway, getting to the point, I'd sincerely like to know what the hell my dreams are about (the ones I remember reasonably clearly, anyway). I've tried looking at them from all perspectives, and they still don't seem to make any sense. Take this one, for instance: the other night I had a very vivid dream where my right shoe wouldn't fit properly. When I took my sock off and examined my foot, I found the sole was covered in a thick coat of hair! I had to shave it before I could get my shoe on. What the hell was that about? I know masturbation is meant to result in hairy palms, but hairy feet? And why only the right foot? Is there some significance in that? The only famous hairy feet I can think of belonged to Lon Chaney Jr in The Wolfman - is this some kind of prediction that I'm about to fall prey to lycanthropy? Perhaps it is a warning that if I wank too much I'll turn into a slavering werewolf motivated to commit nocturnal depravities because of extreme sexual frustration?

While we're on the subject - what about my all time favourit dream - the one where Burt Reynolds is drinking in the lounge bar of my local pub? What does that signify? A secret homoerotic attraction to good 'ol boys sporting stetsons and big moustaches? Who knows? Who really cares? And why do I keep having weirdo dreams like these instead of those wonderful erotic fantasies people in fiction are always having?

Sleaze Diary - What's it All About?

Well, here we are at last, finally launching Sleaze Diary proper (there was an abortive attempt several years ago, but the less said about that, the better). What is Sleaze Diary? Basically, it is intended to be the editorial blog of The Sleaze, where you can find all of my wit, wisdom and demented rantings that won't fit into The Sleaze's bi-monthly editorials. I'm also hoping that this will be the place where some of the main site's future story ideas will emerge and be developed.

What Sleaze Diary isn't, is a replacement for The Sleaze's regular editorial page. Rather, it is intended as a supplement. For a long time now, I've realised that there are just so many ideas, so many things which irritate me, which I just don't have space to air in the main editorial. So, being a massive egotist, I decided to create a blog especially for them! If anything, this is going to be more of a replacement for the main site's message boards, which have never really attracted an enthusiastic following, and never really ignited - although several stories had their genesis there.

Whilst Sleaze Diary is clearly an offshoot of The Sleaze, it is not intended to be a 'spamblog', simply promoting the main site. Although the Sleaze rss-feed is displayed on the left (along with Humorfeed's), I sincerely hope that Sleaze Diary will develop a distinctive character of its own.

So, on with the sleaze!