Conspiring Times

Watching Rudy Giuliani at another of his lunatic press conferences, with what appeared to be oil leaking down the side of his face, it suddenly became clear to me - he's a cyborg lawyer sent back in time by a future President Trump to preserve his timeline and ensure that he remains president by over-turning Biden's election victory.  It is the only way to make sense of this situation: that we are currently faced by two competing, mutually exclusive, timelines.  In one, Trump loses in 2020, Biden becomes president and augurs in a new era of peace and tranquility - an era which sees Trump convicted on multiple fraud and rape charges, spending the rest of his life in poky, the bitch to a convicted serial killer.  The other timeline sees Trump stay in office, declare himself dictator for life and harness the US's technological might to extend his life, turn Giuliani into a cyborg and create time travel.  Obviously, there are considerable differences between to the two timelines historically - that's why Robo-Giuliani became so confused and started claiming that Hugo Chavez and Fidel Castro were behind the conspiracy to cheat Trump of the election.  While they might have both been dead for years in our timeline, in the one he'd come back from, they are very much alive, forming a new communist axis with China and the EU to oppose the freedom loving alliance of Trump's America and Free England under Nigel Farage.

It's the same with his claims about those 'far left' manufactured voting machines deliberately changing Trump votes to Biden ballots - in his timeline, the Democrats responded to the Trump dictatorship by manufacturing their own robots - aided by those commies in Venezuela, Cuba and China - to oppose him, triggering a robo-revolt.  All of which makes far more sense than the alternative: that Joe Biden had summoned  Chavez and Fidel in a seance and got them to possess voting machines with their spirits in order to change votes and steal the election.  Which would simply mean that Rudy is nuts and dyes his hair.  Which, obviously, is ridiculous.  No, I'd rather believe that he is a cyborg from an alternative future where Trump really did win by a landslide, but knows that this timeline can only exist if the alternative - our timeline - is erased.  I'm guessing that the only reason that oil-leaking Robo-Rudy is here is because they've already tried sending other cyborgs back in time to stop Chavez and Fidel from dying, but have failed, leaving this as their last chance to get their timeline back on course.  Indeed, for all we know, future Biden might also have access to time travel and sent his own cyborgs back in time to assassinate Chavez and Fidel in order to ensure that his timeline came into being.  Damn it, we could be sitting at the centre of a time war - let's face it, it is the only way to make sense of what is unfolding before us...