Monday, October 28, 2019

A Brexit Free Halloween?

I'm currently trying to ration myself to writing about Brexit here no more than once a week.  Not only is it a seemingly never ending saga with obvious solutions that nobody seems to want to take, but it really isn't good for my blood pressure.  But we've had another reprieve: we won't be leaving the EU on Halloween, (despite what that very expensive government advertising campaign has been telling us).  Strangely, though, this doesn't appear to mean that Boris Johnson has died in a ditch, (you see, BBC and right wing twats, that isn't an incitement to violence against the PM, but rather a re-purposing of his own words for satiric effect) as he was busy today trying to sell parliament another general election.  Get the message fatso, we don't want your fucking elections, let alone your Brexit deal.  But hey, at least now none of us will run the risk of responding to a knock on the door on Thursday and find ourselves confronted by Boris Johnson and Michael Gove trick or treating:  "For God's sake, it's a trick, isn't it?  It's always a fucking trick with you bastards!"

Speaking of Halloween, (now guaranteed Brexit free folks), I wonder if this year we'll see trick or treaters wearing horrific Johnson and Gove masks?  I should imagine that the Jacob Rees-Mogg mask has been adjudged too terrifying for kids.   Of course, if their parents are devout leavers, then they'll be wearing horrifying (to them) masks of Donald Tusk, Michael Barnier and Jean Claude Juncker.  Maybe even the odd Angela Merkel.  Perhaps we'll see pumpkins carved in effigy of Nigel Farage - now there's a horrifying thought.  Perhaps we'll have to wait until Guy Fawkes Night next week to see the political effigies out in force - atop blazing bonfires.  There would undoubtedly be a real satisfaction in setting fire to Boris Johnson, or Rees-Mogg.  Actually, burning an effigy of the latter would be very apt, bearing in mind that, like Fawkes himself, he is a Catholic agitator plotting to destabilise the nation, albeit via a hard Brexit rather than by literally blowing up parliament.  OK, that's my Brexit ranting ration for the week fulfilled.  Back to less contentious stuff tomorrow.

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