Have You Ever Been Molested by a Former Prime Minister?

I had another rant about the crapness of modern life lined up for today, but, in the end, I just didn't have the energy to write it up.  Besides, there are far too many other interesting things going on that we should be discussing.  Ted Heath, for instance, and the allegations that the late Tory Prime Minister was a paedophile.  Actually, the allegations went further than this - they claimed that he didn't just bugger boys, but that he also murdered them and disposed of their bodies at sea, using his yacht.  Anyway, this week Wiltshire Police, in attempting to defend their investigations into these allegations, announced that if Sir Ted were still alive, they'd probably be interviewing him under caution in regard to some of the claims made against him.   Knowing Wiltshire Police as I do, (I grew up in Salisbury and for a while lived next door to one of the Force's finest), I'm surprised that they'd let a little thing like Heath being dead prevent them from interviewing him. 

Of course, many of the allegation - most of which have now been discounted - resulted from the police's appeal for alleged victims of Heath to come forward.  Surely it should have occurred to them that publishing ads in the local press asking 'Have you ever been bummed by a former Prime Minister?' - was likely to bring all of the nutjobs out of the woodwork?  Moreover, you would have thought that that they would have discounted the twelve who named William Gladstone as an abuser, and the three who admitted that they had mistaken Stanley Baldwin for Heath from the outset, instead of setting up new lines of enquiry into these dead premiers.  At least they didn't pursue the allegations from one 'victim' that Winston Churchill had abused hm by shoving lit cigars up his jacksie.  All of which isn't to say that the police shouldn't have investigated allegations against Heath, despite what various 'outraged' Tory friends of his think. After all, they are the same people who lambasted the police and BBC for not pursuing similar allegations against Jimmy Savile when he was alive.  But hey, we never want to believe these sort of claims when they are directed against someone we know.  Or think we know. After all, none of us wanted to believe that one of our childhood icons, Rolf Harris was a sex offender rather than a harmless eccentric who liked playing the stylophone, did we?