Friday, February 05, 2016

Doom and Gloom in the Lounge Bar

I feel I need to clarify something from the previous post, when I was moaning about You Tube recommending breast feeding videos to me: I have nothing at all against women breast feeding in public places.  Obviously, breast feeding is the most natural thing in the world and it should be much easier for women to do it in public without being ogled by idiots or complained about by morons.  I just don't want to see videos about it - it isn't my 'thing'.  I'm well aware that there are men out there for whom watching women breast feed their babies is a sexual fetish, but I'm not amongst them.  I'm afraid that my fetishes are boringly conventional.  Right, now that's out of the way, onto today's business: people who drag the mood down in pubs.  No, I'm not talking about regular pub bores, (although one of the culprits I have in mind is probably the most boring man in the world), but the type of people who not only go to the pub to have depressing conversations with each other, but who also conduct such conversations so loudly that the entire pub can hear them, pulling the whole mood down.

This isn't a new phenomena.  I remember that, many years ago, when I first stated drinking in my local, there were these two people, a man and a woman, who used to turn up and have very dull and loud conversations, which would always culminate in the bloke, (they weren't married or in a relationship, as far as I could gather, but just friends), drifting off into a dirge about his failed relationships, his inadequacies and how he didn't deserve to be happy.  All of which inevitably put a downer on everyone's evening.   I don't know whatever happened to them - perhaps he topped himself, or finally found true happiness, who knows - but eventually they must have stopped coming in, although I can't say I noticed exactly when, I was just relieved not to have to put up with the cloud of depression they brought with them.  In recent months, however, there seems to have been a resurgence in these types of downers coming into my local. Why, I don't know - maybe other pubs have gotten fed up with them driving trade away and barred them.  Whatever the reasons, they seem to be flocking into the lounge bar of my local pub.

Worst offender is, undoubtedly, the aforementioned world's most boring man, who spends is time blocking the bar whilst attempting to have excruciatingly disjointed and dull conversations with the bar staff.  Even after he's had his last pint, he still loiters, bringing the mood down with his mumblings.  Everybody tries desperately to avoid making eye contact in case he takes that as an invitation to talk to them - you can feel the relief when he finally leaves.  Then there are these two who appear to be a reincarnation of the previous depressing couple.  This time they are, as far as I can discern, brother and sister and their every conversation degenerates into an argument about family.  A conversation conducted so loudly that that everyone can't help but hear them.  Finally, there are the ad hoc groups of boring and depressing bastards which now seem to form spontaneously on quite nights - like last night when I found myself subjected to the collective misery of a trio of these individuals who decided to swap depressing world views.  One of them, I've known for some years, but yesterday she revealed a side pf herself I'd never before encountered: bemoaning what a terrible person she was and how her life was totally shit.  She was joined by another pair that I didn't know, one of whom was one of those people for whom life has clearly been one trial after another, with the world conspiring against them to make their life a misery.  Jesus Christ!  All I'd wanted was a couple of quiet pints!  As their loud lamenting of the unfairness of life went on, I couldn't help but reflect on the fact that I spend a lot of my working days dealing with people who really are at the bottom getting dumped on by life - and they don't complain anything like as much as this lot!

But really, what is wrong with people?  These days, if they aren't depressing everyone else in the pub with their negative waves, they seem to want to start arguments with you under the pretext of having a 'conversation'.  Personally, I go to the pub for a bit of relaxing social drinking - a few conversations about football over a couple of pints, or a bit of a laugh with friends and acquaintances. And on a good night, that's what I get.  But these boring and depressing bastards are making that more and more difficult.  Lighten up and try going to a therapist instead of the pub.  



Blogger Nasreen Iqbal said...

That sounds like a miserable place!

I'm sure they're not all that bad or else you wouldn't be siingling these people out. But wow... watching Tv suddenly doesn't sound so bad.

4:09 am  

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