Och Aye the Noo

Well, it could have been worse. I refer, obviously, to Cameron's visit to Scotland to rally the troops of the 'No' campaign.  Not that his display of mock concern at the possible break up of the Union wasn't sickening enough, (in truth, his main worry isn't the break up itself - which would conveniently get rid of lots of Labour MPs and all those pro-European Scots - rather that he'll be blamed for it).  But it wasn't as bad as I'd envisaged it.  I'd feared that we'd see Cameron, in a kilt, leading a pro-UK parade down the streets of Edinburgh, tossing a caber, with George Osborne at his side playing 'Scotland the Brave' on the bagpipes.  I feared that he'd then follow up this display of his Scottishness by delivering some stock Scottish phrases like 'Och aye the noo' and 'Hoots mon' in those plummy Old Etonian tones of his, before demonstrating that he wore nothing under the kilt by flashing his 'wee dirk'.  That really would have killed the whole 'No' campaign stone dead.

Thankfully, none of that happened and the 'No' to Scottish independence campaign still lives.  Not that I'm implacably opposed to Scottish independence - if I thought that a 'Yes' victory would forever taint Cameron as the Prime Minister who presided over the break up of the Union and precipitate the fall from power of him and his appalling government, I'd happily go North of the border and stuff the ballot boxes with 'Yes' votes.  But, sadly, I suspect that the slippery bastard would still wriggle out of taking any responsibility for such an outcome - he'd inevitably pass the blame on to someone else.  Probably the last Labour government.  Or the unemployed.  Or the disabled.  Definitely public service workers.   If the Scots do vote for independence, though, does that mean that we might see an increase in racial abuse directed against Jocks living in England?  After all, if Scotland is independent, then they'll be immigrants, coming down here, taking our jobs, claiming our benefits.  The tartan bastards - we should round them all up and deport them!