Aggressive Homosexuality and the Lesbian Queen

It never ceases to amaze me, the things that right-wingers become obsessed with, that is.  Right now it's homosexuality, most specifically gay marriage, which has got them going, resulting in some extraordinary rhetoric.  For starters, we've got Tory MP Gerald Howarth warning against 'aggressive homosexuals', gangs of whom are doubtless (in his mind) roaming the country forcing otherwise straight men into homosexuality against their will.  Actually, this is an abiding fantasy of the right: that people's sexual orientation can simply be 'turned', usually under coercion, but also through opportunity.  Back in the sixties, for instance, they were always worrying that if homosexuality was legalised then hordes of heterosexual men would suddenly turn gay.  Just because they could.  Now, if I was a Freudian, or something, I could claim that this is all evidence of the fact that right wingers are clearly very insecure about their own sexuality, fearing that they could be taken by one of those aggressive homosexuals at any time and, worst of all, enjoy it.

But getting back to the original point, the best right wing gay obsessive of late has been dear old Lord Tebbit, a swivel-eyed loon of the old school.  Apparently he's been musing on where all this gay marriage malarkey might end, speculating what having a lesbian Queen might mean for the succession.   After all, as he reasons, if we had a lesbian Queen, who then met another (presumably Royal) lesbian, fell in love and got married, how would the line be continued, who would be her true heir?  After all, if they had a child, it would either have to adopted or, worse, the result of artificial insemination of one, or both, of them, with sperm possibly donated by some awful commoner.  Inevitably, the true Royal line would be, at best, sullied, at worse, completely derailed.  Good points, I think you'll agree.  Although I feel Lord Tebbit has failed to address the main issue - what would the Queen's consort be called?  I mean, they couldn't have the title 'Queen' as well.  That would just be confusing, wouldn't it?

It's good to know that, even in his dotage, Lord Tebbit is devoting his time to serious examinations of constitutional issues which exist only in his own head.  I can't help but notice that his fantasy involved only a lesbian Queen and not the question of what might happen to the succession if a gay King married another gay man.  Presumably such events were just too traumatic for him to imagine.  Nevertheless, I think we should thank him for his contribution to the debate he has fantasised and ask exactly what kind of medication he's on, as I'd like some too!