Not So Smart

As I might have mentioned in passing the other day, I've recently acquired a smart phone as a replacement for my old mobile.  I know that, in the past, I've railed against the 'smart phone bores' who spent all their time in the pub playing with their devices and discussing their operating systems (inevitably Android), but I decided that just because I owned a smart phone, I didn't have to behave like an arsehole. (I hasten to reiterate that I don't consider everyone with a smart phone to be arsehole - just the smart phone bores and idiots who download all those useless apps.  If you are using your smart phone to do something sensible, like reading this blog, then obviously you aren't arsehole). Besides, smart phones are a lot cheaper these days and saving money is always a big motivator for me.  The fact is that I've never really been a phone person, landline or mobile.  Consequently, my poor old mobile has spent a lot of time stuck in my pocket doing very little - it existed mainly to call the AA if my car broke down.  So, when it was clear that I was going to have to replace the increasingly tired and battered Nokia, I decided that I might as well replace it with something that could do a bit more than just make and receive calls and texts, in the hope that this added functionality would encourage me to use it more.

So, in the few days I've owned it, has my smart phone changed my life?  Not really, but it has provided me with an alternative device for web surfing while I'm in bed - it's far more convenient than lugging my laptop upstairs to the bedroom.  It is also likely to replace both my cheap Chinese MP3 player for podcast listening and my venerable digital voice recorder for making podcasts.  It might even allow me to stay on top of my social media accounts a bit better - being away from my laptop most of the day means that I can only belatedly react to a lot of the stuff going on (particularly on Twitter).  I suppose it also means that I can access that online pornography that David Cameron is obsessed by anywhere that I can get a signal.  Bare boobs on demand - how did we ever exist before this innovation?  Oh yes, I can also make phone calls and send texts on the new phone.  If nothing else, I suppose that owning a smart phone means that I've finally joined the twenty first century.  Mind you, as ever, I like to be different so I've eschewed the obvious option of a cheap Android phone and instead have opted for a Windows phone.  Hell, I'm a Nokia loyalist when it comes to mobiles, so a Lumia was always going to be the only choice.  I have to say that the Windows 8 tiled interface makes far more sense on a mobile device than it ever has on a laptop.  As a parting thought, I have to say that I'm slightly disappointed - they call it a smart phone, yet I find that I'm still having to make all the decisions for the device.  That doesn't seem very smart to me...